Life Right Now - Mommy Cha
One of the few Pinoy friends I have in BSD, Cha was our resident “Dora the Explorer” who shares her pasar finds or new restaurants with everyone. Throughout our 1 year of getting to know each other, she has showered our family with so much love- and carbs. A few weeks before they left Indonesia, I asked her to share her thoughts as she prepares for their homecoming soon. We miss your family, Cha!
MOVING OUR LIFE IN BOXES
I still couldn’t sleep thinking about the move and thinking about how life would be for us a month from now. Things have unfolded slowly for us, giving us time to absorb everything. 3 months ago, when Jonie and I decided that it was time to come home for good, I have imagined a totally different scenario. How our long farewell would take place. How we would say goodbye to our dear friends. We imagined a seamless, synchronized timeline of transition. Moving our life in boxes again like we did 6 years ago, now even more complex. 6 years of Ikea shopping should fit in a container van. Now things have unfolded slowly but erratically. There is so much uncertainty, sometimes I feel like things are not real, this couldn’t be real. Just thinking about the possible scenarios in the flight, the possibility of quarantine. If I dwell on it, I would stress eat and lose sleep everyday like now. My friend adviced me to imagine our Blessed Mother’s mantle, to hide under it whenever I feel anxious. I’ve started doing it and I feel her protection already.
Indonesia Cinta Ku, Manila I’m Coming Home
There are a lot of things I will miss about Indonesia: the fast internet connection, the ease of online banking, the pasar, the coffee, Gojek, the tree-lined streets in our town. Most of all how tolerant and kind the people are, and how they value their own culture as shown in their everyday lives- through clothes, through their choice of food. My husband and I agree that Indonesia has tuned us for the better- our patience most especially. I hope our family holds on to that.
Our 6 years in Indonesia was a very laidback life, ideal and easy. Praise be to God we were given this opportunity. The quietness of life here gave us a chance to strengthen our bond as a family, our marriage, and most of all our faith. Now we are bracing ourselves for a force that is called Manila. It takes a certain tough exterior to thrive there, and I guess my kids should have a taste of that too. To see the realties of life in the Philippines: the politics, the erratic school calendar due to typhoons, the urban poor. Living there gives a certain character, compassion, and an edge to a person. Not all are bad, oh not at all. I want them to see how excellent service is done, how people make ways to arrive at point C without going through point B if possible, and the resulting product is equally good and sometimes better than expected. How people are so tired of the government they don’t wait for help but give help even if they have so little. That kind of compassion and civic-mindedness. I want them to see the Philippine beaches not only in December and July where it’s dreary. I want them to experience Holy Week in a Catholic country, have a Catholic education. I want them to have Jollibee more frequently until they get tired of it. I once told them that any Filipino who dislike Jollibee is excommunicated. They get the joke, but they would give anyone the stare if they say they like Mcdo over Jollibee. I want them to experience patriotism beyond the defense of Jollibee.
Family
Everything else I mentioned above is secondary, what it really boils down is this: we want to return to our family. I want them to experience the love of a grandmother, to experience the love and friendship between cousins. All my most treasured things in life as a child, I want them to have it too. A lola’s love is something really special. I know in my heart they are so looking forward to that. Oh and also that dog we promised to give them when we come home. They already have a name, the process of choosing the name deserves another writeup.
A box of memories
This pandemic has made saying goodbye so complicated, but easy in a way, too. Not saying goodbye has definitely made things more surreal. Although on the flip side, it has also saved us, this bunch of sentimental crybabies, from shedding buckets of tears from farewell parties. Maybe things will get serious when the boxes arrive, once packing and sorting commences. It will be a chore but I guess it’s actually the easy part in all of this. It’s the packing and sorting of memories that go along with these things... I wonder: does one ever get a box big enough for that?
